Thursday, November 24, 2011

Love is About You & Me........

Love is not just loving someone, Love is about showing you care, trust & respect the one you love.. Love is not about hugging or kissing someone,but love is need to be express not by
means of stupid things. But by the way you knew it....Love is about only one thing...That's
YOU and ME.......

Monday, November 14, 2011

Love Hurts

Love doesn't always feel good, like many romantics would like to believe. Here is what you can do to ease the pain.

In the early stages of a relationship, it is difficult to imagine that the one for whom you have such strong feelings could ever hurt you. It is also hard to imagine that you could ever cause the one you love pain, especially when everything is so new. The beginning is always sweet and nice, but sooner or later something less than perfect happens, and one of you gets hurt.

Have you ever heard the phrase, "you always hurt the one you love?" It's so true isn't it? You may not mean to, but at some point, you may do something, or not do something, that your significant other is hurt by. The opposite is also true. As a matter of fact, relationships sometimes end because of this fact. They don't always have to, however.

How to Handle the Pain Love Brings You

If you are in a healthy relationship, the hurt was unintentional. It is important to realize that your loved one didn't plan on causing you pain. Try to see the situation from their perspective. You should try to calm your emotions down, and then talk to them about what they were thinking, or why they did what they did, or said what they said. Be willing to see it their way. Once you hear them out, they will be more willing to hear you out. Explain how you perceived what they said or did, and why you felt hurt by it.

You might not be able to communicate this right away. You should wait until an appropriate time, when you are not clouded with emotion. This is easier said than done, but it can be at least be done. Waiting can help you avoid saying things that you don't mean because you are hurt and angry. Get it off your chest by talking it out or writing a brief note or email. Don't just hold a grudge, because it will only hurt you more.

What to Do When Your Loved One Feels Hurt

The most important things that you can do is listen. Showing that you care about their feelings is essential to helping them to heal quickly. You might not understand why they are hurt initially, because you didn't mean to hurt them. Make an effort to see it from their perspective, and try to help them understand your intentions better. Communicate to them that you do care about their feelings.

Apologize if you did something wrong. Make a sincere effort to acknowledge that you could have done things differently, and express plans to avoid that kind of thing in the future. Make it clear that you didn't mean to hurt them, and that you want to avoid doing it again.

What Not To Do

If you feel hurt, don't:
-yell
-try to get revenge or make them pay
-hold a grudge
-demand an apology
-insist that you are right

If your loved on is hurt, don't:
-disregard their feelings as silly
-say you're sorry unless you actually mean it
-pretend to understand
-insist that you are right

Ultimately, clear and honest communicate can help heal the hurt. Be willing both to listen and to talk. If forgiveness, care, and understanding are working parts of your relationship, there won't be that much pain. You will enjoy a long-lasting and healthy relationship that is true to life.

Stages of Love

"Love in the heart was not meant there to stay. Love is not love till you give it away"
For love to be everlasting and eternal every one should be aware of the different stages of love and know its significance. Following are the different phases through which you will travel in your love life and only those who pass it will have an endless love.

Attraction
Attraction can be defined as something, which is more than friendship and is a step towards getting ready for a relationship. Now attraction is of two types:

a. Physical Attraction - happens when your body reacts to another person. Heart rate increases; temperature rises, palms get sweaty; stomach flutters; throat tightens; etc. This is what will tell you that you are ready for the first contact and also whether you are comfortable in the company of the other person.

b. Emotional Attraction - develops next if the circumstances are right. After being drawn to a person physically, you then begin to come closer. If you find you have things in common -- hobbies, ideologies, career, education, or some other common ground -- then an emotional attraction starts to form. Sometimes an emotional attraction can occur even when a physical attraction does not. And in this case, the bond will be stronger between the two who connect, since no preconceived notions based on physical appearance has occurred.

Intimacy
Intimacy is something, which a person experiences when you learn to trust and believe your lover. It is a close association with another person of the deepest nature. You share you thoughts, feelings, and dreams. You feel free to discuss everything with this person and you are absolutely comfortable in his company. Thus intimacy develops gradually. If you can't establish intimacy with your partner, your relationship may work for a while, but is unlikely to endure throughout the years. Intimacy is actually the path to a true, healthy and beautiful relationship.

Romance
Romance is the essence of a relationship. Without romance your love life will not exist. Romance is the true identity of your love. It brings out your true self and helps you be a better lover, husband and partner. Romance is a celebration of the life you live as part of a couple. It springs naturally and originates from within your heart. It makes you do things that you possibly couldn't have imagined to do otherwise. It shows you who you are and reminds you of the role you play in a relationship. Romance is not responsibility but it is caring about your responsibilities towards your lover and partner. Romance is the appreciation of two people who are celebrating the lucky coincidence that they found each other.

Passion
The third stage is passion, which basically means a desire for another person, which has grown to an intensity that can't be ignored. This is often where an emotional relationship turns into a physical relationship. The passion stage is very important. For from here you will understand the true meaning and nature of your relationship. If there is no passion then its best to let go but if there is passion in your relationship then it is time to go on to the next stage.

Commitment
The last stage is commitment. This is when you know that you want to spend your whole life with this person you love and you can do anything for him. It is when your whole world just revolves round your lover and you take a pledge to remain true to your mate throughout good and bad times, be by his side whenever he needs you.

Thus remember all these stages if you want your relationship to last forever. Believe me love is worth the effort. All the best!

Love And Forgiveness

Love and forgiveness go hand in hand making life possible here on Earth as well as in Heaven. Who is your enemy that you should love?

When he had to define love, the apostle Paul spoke very little of its exterior manifestations, but referred to some of the heart's feelings and attitudes. And by "love", he actually means the person with a loving heart. Thus, he stated that love suffers all, it can believe everything, forgive everything, does not find joy in injustice. On the contrary, love rejoices in the truth. Love is not proud; it does not look for its own interest. So this is the picture of the loving soul.

Yet these words are very hard to get, not because they are hard to understand, but rather because our mind is not used to thinking in this way. Whose interests should love actually look after? A loving person should look for his neighbor's interests. But what if one wants to go to a football game, another wants to go to a pub, and another one wants to go fishing. Which one of them should one please? Apostle Paul clearly did not say that we should follow everyone's wishes, for that is not possible, but rather it speaks of a disposition of the heart, of a special attitude that we must have, that of not considering ourselves to be more special than others, to know that between yourself and your neighbor, you should choose your neighbor.

Some may try to please everyone in order to cultivate their brotherly love; others may be merciful and charitable towards their neighbors; but all these suppose a lot of risks. Even if one wanted to give all his fortune to the poor, one day he may remain without a dime and then how would that person express his love? Consequently his way of understanding agape love could no longer be practiced. As a result, all of a sudden, he can no longer help and love his neighbor. The one who listens to everyone and serves everyone may one day realize that people's desires and habits are so different, that even if that person's intention is to help and love his neighbor, can end up in trouble and committing sins that he can no longer face.

So how can we then obey God's commandment to love our neighbor? Perhaps the best choice is to go to the very essence of it. The thing we can do anytime, anywhere, before loving, is to try not to hate. The beginning of good is walking away from evil, perhaps. Before having love in our hearts, before cultivating it, we must get rid of all the evil living in it. This evil may include jealousy, vanity, the idea that we are better than our neighbor, thus how could he possibly tell us what to do, how could they teach us? So all the wickedness that is done with our thoughts and our will should be forsaken and cast out of our hearts. What's more, forgiveness is the beginning of all the good things.

The test of love is to love one's enemies. And who are these enemies? They might not necessarily be the ones breaking into our apartment, stealing our car, the ones attacking our country. Our neighbors may well be the people we despise, we don't like very much and don't really look up to them; people who upset us by their very own presence, by their very own word, by their way of being. The ones we want to get rid of, who bore us, the ones we've had enough of.

When coming into the world, God forgave us for our betrayal, the one committed by our ancestors Adam and Eve. He forgave us for trespassing all his rules, for disobeying all his commandments given to us through the prophets, for not receiving His Son, for having crucified Him. He has forgiven us for everything. And we have to respond with the same type of love. We have to forgive because it is not an impossible thing. It's not impossible to forgive a sinner in front of us. Because God Himself has forgiven that person and this is the most useful type of attitude. This is the correct attitude we must have towards our neighbors.

The only conclusion here is how will we respond to God's forgiveness - by accepting it and applying it to ourselves and others, or not?